I’m a Magpie
With the exception of all manner of fuzzy, feathered, or fishy critters, there’s very little I won’t eat. I love food, all manner of tastes and textures. But there are certain foods that, though I enjoy them in certain dishes, completely gross me out on their own. Here they are: 1. Hard boiled eggs: Tasty on a salad, ghost of Easters past on its own. Remember how you’d eat all the jelly beans, all the chocolate rabbits, and then crack open the egg, only to find that it had turned green? Yeah. 2. Mayonnaise: Fabulous when home-made and served with roasted beets. Delicious in moderation on sandwiches. On its own, in a jar? I can barely look at it. 3. Gum: I had a friend in high school who used to put gum balls in rice krispy treats. As far as I’m concerned, it’s gross no matter where you put it. And does it even count as food if you’ve got to spit it out when you’re done with it? 4. Avocado: I love it in sushi. Even more in Guacamole. But on it’s own, slowly turning brown in its reptile shell? Ew. |
I went grocery shopping with my grandmother and her caregiver today. As we were unloading bags from the car, I was struck with this sudden memory, a full on flashback of the time Brian and I visited grandma back in 2003, when we first moved to the West Coast. I guess grandma must have been about 81 then, and she was oh so much healthier. A little prone to worry, maybe, but not nearly as bad as today, where the gaps in her memory get filled in with imagined illnesses and tragedies. She was always so active, my grandmother, and when Brian and I came back from the grocery store with her, she refused our offers of help, piling her grocery bags into a wheelbarrow she kept by the garage and wheeling them up to the back door with casual ease. Brian and I stood by helplessly, a little stupidly, watching grandma and the wheelbarrow moving towards us in the twilight and waiting for our chance to swoop in and grab the bags so we could at least carry them up the steps. “When we get old, let’s be like your grandma,” Brian said. “Agreed.” Today grandma woke up confused. This morning she sat at the foot of my bed and wondered if my Aunt Carol, her youngest, had taken an overdose of pills, or maybe had a bad fall. She agreed with me that it was probably just a bad dream, but still she couldn’t keep from crying. At the grocery store, too, she was muddled, and when we got home she was convinced the alarm was still on, even though she’d turned it off herself. “I think Carol lost a lot of money,” she said. “She left it in her classroom and forgot to lock the door.” Carol laughed when I called her. “If only I had a large sum of money to lose.” As the day wore on, grandma got better. We went for a walk, and admired the architecture of some nearby houses. “Like a castle!” she said. “I bet it costs a fortune to heat,” I replied. I guess I was a bit gloomy from the morning, too. After we got home, we looked through a picture album while we drank our tea. “Where do they live now?” I asked, pointing to some of my father’s cousins. “They moved to California.” “Oh!” “And then there was a huge fire that raged up the coast, and they were trapped.” “Really?” “Oh, but first they got tuberculosis.” Everyone gets tuberculosis in my grandma’s stories lately. I don’t know what that’s about. Anyway, then we had dinner, and then we settled in for a night of PBS, first the Human Spark and then the Audition. The latter programme (see that extra ‘me’ there? I’m in Canada) chronicled the Metropolitan Opera’s annual National Council auditions, where young opera singers from around the country compete for a cash prize, a chance to sing at the Met, and a jumpstart on their opera careers. Grandma’s not a huge opera fan, but she seemed to enjoy the show for the most part, making comments about various singers’ abilities and mannerisms and watching fairly raptly. With about a half hour to go, though, she’d had enough and decided to go to bed. “I’ll be up in a bit,” I said. “I want to see who wins.” “Oh yes,” said Grandma. “The ghost!” Seems like the ghost always wins. |
Hello! I’m afraid I’ve been neglecting things over here, along with everything else that’s not a paper on database systems or intellectual freedom. But the semester’s almost done, which makes this a great time to explore the hotses and notses of the week a la Loobylu. Hot! 1. Backyard Astronomy: Or in our case, Duboce Park astronomy. Over the summer, when I was visiting my folks, I asked my dad for advice on telescopes after Sweetney tweeted a question about telescopes for beginners (File under: sentences that would not have made sense in the Twentieth Century). Dad did some research (try and stop him), and found that one of his favorite telescope-vendors offered a relatively inexpensive option, good for city-viewing and simple enough for inexpert astronomers. Fast forward to yesterday, when Dad’s itchy Xmas trigger finger resulted in an early-December surprise telescope at our door. Brian and I braved the cold (and clouds) and spent a happy if frigid hour in Duboce Park looking at the moon before toddling home for some hot chocolate. Hurrah for astronomy! The moon is pale and lovely, especially up close. 2. Brian! The boy is all sorts of hot. He finished his latest piece Monday, and he’s just put a show up at Bean There, a cafe in our neighborhood. It’s got high ceilings and loads of morning light, and his pieces look great. We’ll be hosting a reception at 7 o’clock this Friday (tomorrow, that is). Stop by if you live in San Francisco! I might invite you to go moon-watching. Not! Mess. The house is in chaos, and it’s 99.9% my doing. I need to clean my closets, but first I need to sort through the piles of things piled in front of the closets because the closets are in such chaos. Money. Being in grad school ain’t earning me any. In fact, it’s costing money. Whose bright idea was that? Alright. Enough with the notses, back to the hotses! Here’s another look at Fixed Landscape #4: |
I found my cellphone (it was in my bathrobe pocket). |
I'm a freelance writer and perpetual graduate student living in San Francisco. Special skills include dog charming, brochure writing, slapdash cooking and long-winded nattering. I also enjoy watching the sunset reflected in the tall buildings downtown.
For a while there, I taught classes on Classical literature, philosophy, and the history of religion at New College of California. I have an MA and an MFA in Writing, and started library school in the fall of 2009.